RIX AND HIS FRIENDS IN OZ

An original script by Ann Seeger

"A Boy and His Genie" and "Marooned" by 3tch

 

 

 

 

RIX AND HIS FRIENDS IN OZ

An original script by Ann Seeger

 

MAIN CHARACTERS

 

RIX----------------------------- a boy

JIMSY------------------------- a somewhat emotional Djinn

DOROTHY-------------------- a girl

SAWHORSE------------------ a living, wooden animal

PARBELO--------------------- proprietor of a small circus

CHLOE------------------------ a Stare-e-oxican (a primitive animal resembling a buffalo)

 

 

MINOR CHARACTERS

 

AB------------------------------ a heel, proprietor of rival circus

 

ROUSTABOUTS

STARE-E-OXICAN ---------- a member of Chloeís herd

WHITE OWLíS FEATHER-- one of the Little People

SMIDGINS-------------------- another of the Little People

UNCLE------------------------ Rixís cruel Guardian


 

-I-

 

NARRATOR:    The brown bottle had been bobbing along just out of reach for some time before Rix finally snared it in his battered net.  Most of the things Rix fished out of the river werenít worth a second look, but the bottle was very unusual.  It had been so carelessly blown; it was a mere blob of glass, and it was tightly sealed with a knobby glass stopper.  Besides, something stirred inside it.  In order to see what it was Rix held the bottle up in the bright sunlight but the glass was too dark to permit a clear view.  The boy held the bottle to his ear, half expecting to hear a buzzing sound.   He was astonished to hear, instead, a tiny, but distinct little voice:

 

JIMSY:              Let me out!  Let me out!  Let me out!

RIX:                  What!  What?  Was that you?  Are you in this bottle?

JIMSY:             You heard me!  You heard me!  Iím in this bottle and I want out!
RIX:                  ButÖ how is it you can talk?  Arenít you a bug?

JIMSY:             A bug!  Donít be insulting.  I am an imp... a Djinn, to be exact. Surely you have   heard before of Djinns being trapped in bottles.

RIX:                  Why, yes I have.  And Iíve always heard itís dangerous to let them out, too.

JIMSY:           Dangerous!  That depends on yourself, I should think.  All I do is grant three wishes to the person who liberates me.  If your wishes arenít dangerous, what would you have to worry about?

RIX:                  I donít know, but Iím still not sure I should let you out.

JIMSY:             Donít tell me Iíve been fished out of the river by somebody who is so completely satisfied with his lot that he doesnít wish for a thing in this world!

RIX:                  Oh, no!  It isnít that.  But, I wish for so much...

JIMSY:             Three wishes is all I grant.  Itís a rule.

RIX:                  I have this lame leg.  How could you cure that?

JIMSY:             Simple.  It would be extremely simple for me to fix that up for you... if you mention it after you let me out of this bottle.

RIX:                 And, andÖ I live on my Uncleís canal-boat.  He doesnít want me, but he doesnít know how to get rid of me, and I donít know how to get away...

JIMSY:             Absolutely no reason for you to stay where youíre not wanted.

RIX:                  You donít understand.  Thereís no place for me to go, or Uncle would have

                          sent me there a long time ago.

JIMSY:             And you donít seem to understand.  Until you pull out that stopper and release me, I can be of no assistance to you at all.  Iím no help to you, or myself, or anybody at all cooped up like this.

UNCLE:            (OFFSTAGE) Rix!  You lazy swab!  Where are you?

RIX:                  Oh no!  Here comes Uncle now.

JIMSY:             Are you going to sit there until he comes along and takes me away from you?  If he lets me out of the bottle, Iíll have to grant him the three wishes instead of you.

UNCLE:            (FADE ONSTAGE) So!  Thatís what youíre up to.  Blast if I donít throw that net away if you... Whatcha got there?  Give it to me.

RIX:                  No!  Itís just an old bottle I fished out of the river.

UNCLE:            Hand it here, I say.

RIX:                  No!  No!  Not until I pull out this...

SOUND:           POP! SWISH!

UNCLE:            Avast!  Whereís all that smoke coming from?

RIX:                  Wow!  Oh, oh my!

UNCLE:            Who is that lubber?   Whereíd he come from?

RIX:                  Youíre so big!  Biggerín Uncle...

UNCLE:            Big?  Fat!  Just fat.

JIMSY:              (BIG DEEP VOICE) Thank you, Master.  Command me and I obey.

UNCLE:            What in blue blazes is going on around here?  Why are you bowing to Rix?  Iím master of this boat and I can lick a tub of lard like you in two minutes.  Then Iíll larrup some ambition into you, Rix my boy...

REX:                 No, Uncle... donít!  Please... I wish to be far, far away... in the pleasantest, happiest country in the whole world!

 

-II-

 

SOUND:           SWOOSH!  SWOOSH!  SWOOSH!

JIMSY:             Your first wish has been granted, Master.

RIX:                  Where... where are we?

JIMSY:             Right where you wished to be.  In the Land of Oz!

 

MUSIC:            UP AND OUT

 

JIMSY:             What troubles you, Master?   Are you not satisfied with the cure I performed on your leg?

RIX:                  Of course I am.   Itís wonderful.   This leg is as good and strong as anybodyís in the world.   You can do anything... anything.

 

JIMSY:             Well... for one more time I can.   Youíve used up two of your wishes, you know.  

                         The  cure for your leg  and your transportation to this wonderful Land of Oz.
 

RIX:                  I guess thatís what bothers me.   Itís a very pretty country, but we havenít seen 

                          anybody here yet.

 

JIMSY:             Not likely to see anybody so far out in the country, I suppose.

RIX:                  Why didnít you transport us to a town while you were at it?

JIMSY:             Why didnít you ask me to?

RIX:                  It happened too fast.  I didnít have time to think it out.  Maybe Iíd better do

                          something about it.

JIMSY:             UhÖ Iím not supposed to warn you, but you have only one more wish coming,

                          you know.  People have been known to forget to be careful and to make an idle

                          wish they afterward regret.

RIX:                  Thank you for warning me... er... do you have a name?

JIMSY:             My name is Jimsy.  Donít ask me why, Iíve forgotten how it happened.

RIX:                  Well, Iím going to make my last wish right now, Jimsy, before I accidentally

                          wish for something foolish.

JIMSY:             No rush about it.  Itíll keep good as new forevermore until itís used up.

RIX:                  Iím not going to take any chances.  I know what I wish for.

JIMSY:             You canít be sure.  You might think of something more important if you give

                          it more thought.

RIX:                  Nothing could be more important than friends.  Iíve never had a chance to

                          have any friends.

JIMSY:            Friends!  Why, nice lad like you can step out and make friends any time youíve a mind to.  No need to squander a wish on that.

RIX:                  But Iíve never had any friends, Jimsy.  The wish wouldnít be squandered.

JIMSY:             Have you considered all the angles, Master?  Are you sure about this?  Wouldnít

                          it be wise to hang onto that wish for a rainy day or something?  Arenít you being a mite hasty?  Shouldnít you sleep on the idea?  Why donít you....

RIX:                  Jimsy!  You said youíd grant me three wishes and Iíve only had two.  Are you

trying to back out of your promise?

JIMSY:             Allah forbid!  You make a wishóIógrant it.  Iím merely cautioning you to

take more time about... Whatís your great hurry, anyway?  Once you make that wish, itís gone.  No taking it back and exchanging it for something else.  When itís gone, itís gone, and...

RIX:                  Itís no use, Jimsy.  I wish I had some friends.  Good, true, loyal friends...

SOUND:           CLATTER OF RED WAGON APPROACHING

RIX:                  Here comes a red wagon down the road.  Are these my new friends, Jimsy? Thereís a little girl in the wagon andówhat a strange animal pulling it.  Looks like an ordinary sawhorse, only itís alive...

SOUND:           WAGON FULLS UP AND STOPS

DOROTHY:     Pardon me.  Can you tell us where we are?

RIX:                  Us?  Arenít you alone in that wagon?

DOROTHY:     I mean the Sawhorse and me.  My name is Dorothy and I live in the Emerald City.  The Sawhorse is a friend of mine, although he sometimes gets me into jams be≠cause he doesnít always think.

SAWHORSE:   If I were meant to be a Thinking creature, Iíd probably be riding in this wagon

instead of pulling it.

RIX:                  Youíre in the Land of Oz... I think.

SAWHORSE:  Ha!  Now thereís a boy who says he thinks, and he tells us weíre in the Land of Oz.  Weíd need wings to carry us across the Deadly Desert to be anywhere else.

DOROTHY:     Hush, Sawhorse.  Donít be rude.  I mean, can you tell us where in the Land of Oz we are?

RIX:                  No... I seem to be lost.

DOROTHY:     It looks like we are, too.  We started out to visit the Tin Woodman, and the

                          Sawhorse took a shortcut heíd heard about.

SAWHORSE:   Thatís what comes of trying to think when one isnít equipped for it.


DOROTHY:     It doesnít matter, Sawhorse.  We canít be so very far from the Emerald City.

                          And maybe weíve found a new friend.

RIX:                  I would like very much to be your friend.  Iím a stranger here with no family

                          or home.

DOROTHY:     Then you may as well get into the wagon with me.  Weíll take you back to the

                          Emerald City if you like, where you can meet lots of interesting people.

RIX:                  Thank you!  Thank you very much.

DOROTHY:     Does youróer... friend want to come along?

RIX:                  Who?  Oh... Jimsy!  I forgot all about him.

SAWHORSE:   How could you forget anybody as big and outlandish-looking as that?  Has he

                          got a headache?

RIX:                  No, thatís a turban he wears around his head.

DOROTHY:     Do you care to join us, Jimsy?

JIMSY:             SNIFF!

DOROTHY:     Whatís wrong with him?  Is he bashful?

RIX:                  Bashful?  I donít think so, Jimsy, what is the matter with you?

JIMSY:             (On the verge of tears) YouÖ have friends now, Rix... and you no longer need me!

RIX:                  What on earth are you talking about?  Do you want to come with us... or donít

  you?  I have no wish to be a millstone around your neck.  I can grant you no more

.......................                           wishes.  So, go along with your new friends and be happy.  Donít worry about me.  

                                                  IÖ Iíll get along (sniff) Somehow...

DOROTHY:     I do believe heís going to cry!

RIX:                 I donít understand, Jimsy.  Youíre free now. I thought youíd want to vanish or something and go home the minute you granted my last wish.

JIMSY:             Home?  I have no home.  My place is by my Masterís side and right now I

                          have no Master since you finished with me, Rix.  I (sniff) am of no more use to

                          you... but I will not be a (sniff) burden...

DOROTHY:     The poor thing!   Come on, Jimsy!  Get into the wagon with us.  Youíll freeze if

  you stay out all night dressed like that.

JIMSY:             Do you mind, Rix, if I tag along?

RIX:                  Mind?  I should say not!  Iíd be happy to have you, Jimsy!

SOUND:           WAGON SPRINGS CREAK

JIMSY:             I hope I donít crowd you too much.  I seem to have put on a little weight.

                          Lack of exercise, I suppose.


MUSIC:            UP AND OUT

 

JIMSY:             (Plaintively) Iím hungry, Rix.

RIX:                  Weíre all hungry, Jimsy, but I donít know what we can do about it right now.

                          Nobody was home at any of the farmhouses where we stopped.

JIMSY:             But look at all that fruit hanging around on the trees, and look at those

gardens, so full of...

RIX:                  I told you, Jimsy!  Itís wrong to take things that donít belong to you without

permission.

JIMSY:             Oh fiddle-cum-fee!  How can we ask permission if nobodyís home?  Where is

                          everybody, anyway?  Why arenít these farmers home tending their crops, and

                          their wives home baking bread and cookies, and their children home eating

                          between meals.

DOROTHY:    Thereís your reason, Jimsy.  Look over there in that field.

RIX:                 Itís a carnival!  Everybodyís gone to the carnival!

DOROTHY:    There must be something to eat over there.  Trot on over, Sawhorse.  This ought

                         to be fun!

JIMSY:             Whatís a carnival?

SAWHORSE:   You donít know?  And all the time I thought that was where you escaped from.

JIMSY:             Rix!  Make the Sawhorse cut that out! I think heís teasing me.

 

MUSIC:            UP AND OUT

 

DOROTHY:     Stop, Sawhorse!  Mmmmmm!  Doesnít that food smell good?


RIX:                  I should say they do.  I hope we can get some.

 

DOROTHY:     We can try... Hurry!  I think the showís already started.


JIMSY:             Wait!  Wait for me, Rix!

 

SAWHORSE:   I donít think they heard you, Jimsy.  Youíll have to run to catch up with them.

JIMSY:             Run!  I canít even get out of this cursed wagon.  Iím stuck           

SAWHORSE:   Stuck!  (Sawhorse laughs)  Arenít you the one who gets in and out of bottles at will?

JIMSY:             Laugh, you wooden beast!  I was tricked into entering that bottle and adjusted myself to it.  I didnít know the wagon was too small for me so I didnít adjust.

PARBELO:       (FADE ONSCREEN) There you are, there you are, at last!  Thank goodness you came in costume!

JIMSY:             Costume?  Are you speaking to me?

PARBELO:       Yes-yes.  Certainly.  I was beginning to think my message didnít reach the Supply Center in time.  Now hurry!  Hurry, will you?  The showís already begun.

JIMSY:             Hurry?  Where? Why?

PARBELO:       Thunderation!  Did they send me a nincompoop or a clown!  The entrance is over yonder. There!

SAWHORSE:   Clown?  Why did you send for a clown?

PARBELO:       Two nincompoops!  I send for one clown and they send me two nincompoops.  I

  tell you the show has begun; get in there and do your turn around the ring!

SAWHORSE:   (Sawhorse laughs) Around the ring?  Hang tight, Jimsy!  Here we go!

SOUND:           RATTLE OF WAGON

JIMSY:             Stop it, Sawhorse!  Now you cut that out!  Iím no clown...  Rix!  Rix!

 

MUSIC:            UP AND OUT

 

DOROTHY:     Wasnít it nice of Mr. Parbelo to let us in to see his show?

RIX:                  Yes, but I keep wondering what happened to Jimsy.  He said he was so hungry, but he didnít come with us.

DOROTHY:    Rix!  Look!  Look whoís entering the ring!

RIX:                 Why, itís the Sawhorse and the red wagon, and Jimsy!  What are they doing?

DOROTHY:    They seem to be part of the show...

SOUND:          CROWD LAUGHING

DOROTHY:    Theyíre funny!  Listen to the crowd laugh.

RIX:                 Look at the expression on Jimsyís face, and the way he hangs on to his turban

                         with both hands.  I wonder how he keeps from falling out of the wagon.

SOUND:          APPLAUSE

DOROTHY:    Theyíre sure to be the hit of the show.  I wish theyíd ride around the ring again. 

                          Iíll never forget how funny Jimsy looked like he was about to cry.

RIX:                  And that red sash flying in the breeze, and he did look like he was going to

                          cry, didnít he?  He was yelling something, too.  I wonder what.

DOROTHY:     I donít know. The crowd was so noisy I couldnít hear what he was shouting.  Say,

                          you donít sípose somethingís wrong?

RIX:                  Come on, Dorothy, letís go find him.

 

MUSIC:            BRIEF PASSAGE OF TIME

 

JIMSY:             Rix!  Rix!  Help!

DOROTHY:     I hear him.  Heís over there.

RIX:                 He must have been stuck in the wagon.  That skinny man with the mustache is pulling him out.  Heís trying to pull him out anyway.  It looks like Jimsy is fighting him off.  Iím coming, Jimsy.  Iím coming!

JIMSY:             Rix!  Help!  Get your hands off me, you!  Hurry, Rix... before this man

                          liberates me!

SOUND:           POP!

AB:                   There you are, my man.  Youíre free.

JIMSY:             Nobody asked you to pull me out of that wagon!

AB:                   Asked me to?  Glad to do it for you.  Your act was great!  Simply great!

                          Whatever Parbelo is offering you, Iíll double it if youíll come with my show.

PARBELO:       (COMING ONSCREEN) Hold on there!  Hold on there!  What are you doing,

                          Ab?

AB:                   Why, I just happened to be in the neighborhood and dropped in to catch the

                          performance.

PARBELO:       Strange how often you happen to be in my neighborhood, and how my best

                          talent is always gone when you leave.

AB:                   Tut!  Tut!  Is it my fault you under-appreciate your artists?

RIX:                  Who is this man, Mr. Parbelo?

PARBELO:       He is my former partner.  I taught him everything he knows about show business and he repaid me by skipping out with my best acts and setting up a rival extravaganza of his own.

AB:                   Please!  Letís not be bitter, Parbelo.  The fact that my show has prospered and yours has gone to seed proves which of us is the better showman.

PARBELO:       The only thing it proves is that you are an underhanded sneak-thief; but it wonít work this time, Ab.  This clown was sent to me by the Supply Center and heís under contract to me.

AB:                   Is this true, my man?  Are you under contract to this small-time operator?

                          When does this contract expire?

JIMSY:             Under what?  To who?  (Wail)  Rix!  Where were you?  Why didnít you come when I called?

RIX:                  I came as fast as I could, Jimsy, as soon as I knew you wanted me.

JIMSY:             These men think Iím a clown, and you didnít get here in time to stop the

                          skinny one from freeing me.

PARBELO:       Iím warning you, Ab.  Get out of here!

AB:                    Now there you go losing your temper again.  Anger befogs the wits, you know.

PARBELO:       You left this carnival of your own free will, and now Iíll thank you to stay away.   Clear away.  I wish you and your thieving circus were in the furthermost outpost of the Land of Oz.

RIX:                  So do I.  You leave Jimsy alone.

SAWHORSE:   So do I.

DOROTHY:     My goodness!  So do I!

AB:                   Arenít you the sweet ones!  Leave my circus out of it!  And I wish the same for

                          the lot of you, including your precious new clown and your seedy circus!

SOUND:           SWOOSH!  SWOOSH!  SWOOSH!

PARBELO:       Great thundering hoptoads!  What hit us?

AB:                    Was it an earthquake?  I mast be dizzy... everything looks different.

DOROTHY:      I should say it does look different.  Weíre in a different place than we were three seconds ago.

PARBELO:       What kind of trick is this, Ab?

AB:                    Trick?  Me?  You flatter me, Parbelo.  If I could perform a trick like that I wouldnít waste my energy luring second-rate talent away from you.

ROUSTABOUT (1): Parbelo!  Parbelo!  Hey boss!  What happened?  Where are we, boss? 

ROUSTABOUT (2):   Where is the crowd?  Where are the houses?

PARBELO:       I donít know where we are.  Nobody knows where we are, if there is anybody

                          besides ourselves in this desolate looking place.

ROUST: (1)      Whatíll we do, boss?

PARBELO:       What can we do?  Tell everybody to start loading.

ROUST: (1)      Are we going to move on?

PARBELO:       As fast as we can.  I donít like the looks of this place.  Just scrubby bushes and rocks.  That steep cliff all around makes me feel like Iím at the bottom of a giant mixing bowl.

ROUST: (1)      Hear that, men?  Get to work!  Weíre going to roll!

ROUST: (2)      We canít start rolling soon enough to suit me.

PARBELO:       Everybody will have to pitch in and help, including you, Ab.  Unless you prefer

                           being left behind.

AB:                    Me?  Work?

PARBELO:       Work or stay here.  I donít know why I even give you a choice, come to think of it.

DOROTHY:     Well, we donít want to be stranded here, either, so come on, Rix, letís see what

                          we can do to help load up.

 

MUSIC:            UP AND OUT

 

JIMSY:             Donít look at me like that, Rix.  I called you as loud as I could.  I called

and called and called, but you let that Ab free me from the wagon. I couldnít stop him.

RIX:                  I know it, Jimsy.  It isnít your fault, but this is an awful place you brought us to.

DOROTHY:     Jimsy brought us here?

JIMSY:             I couldnít help it, Dorothy.  Ab freed me from the wagon so I must grant him

                          three wishes.  Itís a rule we Djinns have.

RIX:                  Ab wished us all in the furthermost outpost of the Land of Oz, so here we

                          are.  It was an accident that included himself in the wish.

DOROTHY:     Three wishes?  Then he has two more coming.  Why canít he wish us all back

                          again?

RIX:                  Ab doesnít know about Jimsy, Dorothy, or that he has two more wishes coming.

                          I donít think we ought to tell him, either.  Heíd probably wish only himself back

                          if he knew, and leave the rest of us here.  I donít trust him.

JIMSY:             I donít trust him either, but I have to stick with him until he uses up his

                          wishes.  Rix!  Donít let me lose you!

RIX:                  I wonít if I can help it, Jimsy.  Youíd better get to work now, though, or

                          Parbelo wonít let you travel with the circus.

JIMSY:             Do I have to, Rix?  Itís awfully hard work for me to work.  Iím not used

                          to it.

RIX:                  Youíll have to get used to it, Jimsy.  Even Ab is working.  See?  Here he is, now.

JIMSY:             Where are you going with that box, Ab?  Can I help you carry it?

AB:                   You can carry the whole thing, for all I care.  Look!  Blisters on my hands,

                          already!

JIMSY:             (SLYLY) Tsk, tsk, tsk!  And we arenít half loaded.  Too bad this entire

               carnival had to come along when we were transported here.  I wish it had

               been left behind.

AB:                    So do I!

JIMSY:             What?  What did you say, Ab?

AB:                    I said I wish the circus had been left behind when we were transported here.

 

- III -

 

SOUND:           SWOOSH!  SWOOSH!  SWOOSH!

PARBELO:       (OFFSTAGE) Hey!  Hey there!  Hey, hey!

JIMSY:             (In a whisper) How was that, Rix?  I got rid of one more wish, and the circus, too!

RIX:                  Pretty clever, but I donít know if you should have done it, Jimsy.  Look at Ab.  

                          Heís standing there like he was hit over the head.  I think heís beginning to

                          suspect.

PARBELO:       It was no earthquake that time!  I didnít feel a thing.  Just all of a sudden, the

                          whole circus disappeared!  Including the very wagon I was standing in.

SOUND:           DISTANT THUNDER APPROACHING

DOROTHY:     Whatís that?  Do you hear that?

SAWHORSE:   I hear it, but I canít tell you what it is.

DOROTHY:     It sounds like thunder, but there isnít a cloud in the sky.

RIX:                  That must be it.  See?  It looks like a huge cloud of dust moving toward us

                          across the prairie.

PARBELO:       Animals!  Itís a herd of animals coming this way at full gallop.

RIX:                  Ooh!  And here we are alone with nothing to hide behind but the red wagon and nobody to help us. 

SOUND:           THUNDER SWELLS TO CRESCENDO

 

MUSIC:            UP AND OUT

 

PARBELO:       Bless my eyes!  I thought these beasts were extinct!

DOROTHY:     They donít seem vicious... Most animals in Oz arenít, but they make me nervous

                          just standing there, staring at us.

RIX:                  There must be hundreds of them!  Weíre penned in here in the middle of this

                          herd until they decide to move on.

PARBELO:       What I wouldnít give to have a specimen for my circus.

DOROTHY:     Specimen?!  Do you imagine Ozma would allow such a thing?

PARBELO:       I donít mean it like that; I meant an individual to travel with us.  Sorry,

                          sometimes old terminology is hard to lose.

DOROTHY:     Thatís true.  Do you know what kind of species they are?  Iíve never seen anything like them.  At first I thought they were buffalo, but they have necks like a giraffe... and those eyes!

SAWHORSE:   They better not pop their eyes at me!

PARBELO:       Theyíre harmless, Sawhorse.  These beasts are Stare-e-oxicans.  They are very inquisitive by nature, but also very timid.  If you startle them they might stampede right over us and flatten us out like pancakes.

RIX:                  What do we do?  Stand here until we starve to death?

AB:                   (Suddenly) Ha!  Aha!  I donít know what the rest of you are going to do, but

                          I know what Iím going to do.  Iím going to the Emerald City to live a life of ease

                          and luxury!

PARBELO:      What do you mean, Ab?  Have you taken leave of your senses?

AB:                   I have just come to my senses!  Do you realize that I merely wished you, and

                          accidentally myself, in the furthermost outpost of the Land of Oz, and we were

                          immediately here?  Then I wished that the circus had been left behind, and it

                          immediately disappeared?

PARBELO:       You wished that?

AB:                    Indeed I did.  Obviously something has happened, I donít know what, but

                          my every wish seems to come true.  So!  I wish to be in the Emerald City right

                          now.

SOUND:           SWOOSH!  SWOOSH!  SWOOSH!

PARBELO:       Heís gone!  Ab has disappeared!

JIMSY:             Oh yes.  Heís in the Emerald City, where he wished to be, and good riddance,

                          I say.

PARBELO:       Then itís true?  All his wishes are granted?

JIMSY:             Not any more they arenít.  He just used up his last wish.  While I was at it, I placed him in the Royal Palace, in Princess Ozmaís boudoir.  Let him explain how he got there if he can!

SOUND:           (EVERYBODY LAUGHS)

STARE-E-OXICANS: Boo!  Boo!  Boo!  Bah!  Bah!

DOROTHY:     Oh my!  We almost startled the Stare-e-oxicans!  Maybe Ab is no worse off than

                          we are, at that.

 

MUSIC:            UP AND OUT

 

JIMSY:             Rix!  Iím tired!

RIX:                  We all are, Jimsy.  I wonder how long it will take these beasts to look us over

                          enough to go away.

PARBELO:       According to the books on animal lore Iíve read, it depends on whether

                          something else attracts their attention, or when they last ate.  They can store up

                          enough food to last them ten days.

JIMSY:             Personally, Iíll die of starvation in ten hours.

SAWHORSE:   You?  You can live on your fat for ten months at least.

DOROTHY:     Sawhorse!  Donít be mean!

JIMSY:             Rix!  Do I have to let that wooden beast talk to me that way?

RIX:                  I donít know how you can stop him, Jimsy, but this is no time to bicker.  What

                          else do you know about these beasts, Mr. Parbelo?

PARBELO:       Well, theyíre extinct, of course.

DOROTHY:     Apparently, no one told them that!

PARBELO:       They are sympathetic and affectionate by nature if you can overcome their

                          timidity.

DOROTHY:     For goodness sake, overcome their timidity then!  Maybe theyíll quit looking

                          so wall-eyed and show us a little sympathy.

PARBELO:       How can I do that?

DOROTHY:     Talk to them!  All animals in the Land of Oz can talk if they want to, silly.

PARBELO:       Easy for you to say.  Iím not a very good talker.  Ab was always better at that

                          than I am.  But, I suppose I can try.

RIX:                  Iím sure youíll do fine.

PARBELO:       Harruraph!  Hey!  You there!

STARE:            Boo!  Bah!  Boo!

RIX:                  I think youíd better speak more gently, Mr. Parbelo.  They seem disturbed.

PARBELO:       Yes, yes, yes.  Uh... you there!

CHLOE:           Bah?

PARBELO:       Yes...you.     

CHLOE:           You speakum to me?

PARBELO:       Yes.  Ahem!  Can you take us to your leader?

CHLOE:           Me donít savvy.

PARBELO:       You donít?  Ok, well, can you quit popping your eyes and stand back so we can get out of here?

CHLOE:           Hokay!  Why you not say so?  Bah!  Bah!  Bah!

DOROTHY:     Theyíre moving back!  Theyíre opening up a lane wide enough for the red

                          wagon to get through.

SAWHORSE:   Pile in everybody; Iíll make a dash for it.

PARBELO:       No!  Donít do that, Sawhorse.  If you dash, you might startle the Stare-e-

                          oxicans.  Just move slowly and calmly.

SAWHORSE:   There isnít room in the wagon for all of you.  Jimsy takes up enough room for

                          two, and anyway, heíd only get stuck again.

DOROTHY:     We should have thought of that. 

RIX:                  I have an idea.  If Jimsy gets into the wagon heíll be stuck again, then one of us

                          can pull him out, and will have three wishes coming, and wish us all out of here!

JIMSY:             No, Rix, that wouldnít work.  That would be collusion.  Itís against the rules.

                          The rest of you get into the wagon and Iíll walk if the Stare-e-oxicans donít close

                          in and hold me back.  Go ahead, Rix, if you arenít willing to pull me out of the

                          wagon without reward, IíllÖ Iíll walk, or stay here, as the case (sniff) may be.

RIX:                  Stop that, Jimsy!  You know Iíll pull you out of the wagon without a reward.

CHLOE:           Bah.  You come?

PARBELO:       Weíd better get going.  Get into the wagon, Jimsy.  Iíll walk.

CHLOE:           Walk?  You no walk.  You get stepped on.

PARBELO:       Stepped on!

CHLOE:           You my friend.  You talk to me.  Me no want you stepped on.  You ride.

PARBELO:       Ride!  How can I?  The wagon is full without me.

RIX:                  If Parbelo is your friend, will you carry him on your back?

CHLOE:           Carry him?  Bah!  Hokay.  Me carry.

PARBELO:       Well, this is very kind of you.         

DOROTHY:     Oh, get on his back, Parbelo, weíve wasted enough time as it is.  The Stare-e-

                          oxicans are getting restless again.

STARE:            Booo!  What you do, Chloe?  Where you go?  Boo!

CHLOE:           Me take these fella to Mountain Pass.  They go home now.

STARE:            You crazy, Chloe.  Mountain Pass... that big secret!

CHLOE:           This cute fella.  He no tell secret.  Stand back, Boys.  Bah!

DOROTHY:     Oh my!  I hope theyíll stand back for Chloe.

CHLOE:            You want these fella stay here always?  Always watch us?  Always look?  

                          Always peek?

STARE:            That right.  Nothing else to do here.  Let-um go.  Boo!

DOROTHY:     Giddy-ap, Sawhorse.  Letís get out of here before these Stare-e-oxicans change

                          their minds.

 

MUSIC:            UP AND OUT

 

JIMSY:             Who invited these critters to tag along, anyhow?  If that one in the lead follows

                          any closer, heíll be resting his eyeballs on my shoulder.

RIX:                  Cheer up, Jimsy.  We must be almost to the Pass by now.  We certainly canít go

                          much further until we do find a pass.

SAWHORSE:   I donít think that Chloe beast has any notion where sheís taking us.  She keeps

                          her head twisted around to talk to Parbelo instead of watching where sheís

                          going.

DOROTHY:     I donít see how she prevents herself from stumbling over these rocks.  Now,

                          where did she vanish?

SAWHORSE:   A good thing you arenít pulling this wagon.  They went between those two big

                          rocks up there, and turned to the right.

DOROTHY:     Oooh!  The wagon can just barely squeeze through.

STARE:            Boo!

JIMSY:             Zounds!  If youíre going to do that, please turn your head.

STARE:            This is entrance to Pass.  Chloe come home now.

DOROTHY:     Why, thereís a tunnel wide enough for the wagon and not very long either.  I can

                          see daylight at the other end.

STARE:            Chlooooooeeeee!

JIMSY:             Now you cut that out!

STARE:            Chloe!  Boooo!

CHLOE:           Bah!  You go home.  Me go with this fella.

STARE:            You come home, Chloe!  Boo!

CHLOE:           Me go!  Bah!

JIMSY:             Oh go on home, Chloe, while my eardrum is still in one quivering piece.

CHLOE:           No.  Me go!  See Emerald City!  See world!  See carnival!

SCARE:            Boo!

CHLOE:           Bah!

JIMSY:             Rix!  Make them cut that out, Rix!

 

MUSIC:            UP AND OUT

 

DOROTHY:     Look!  We came out on the side of a mountain.  This tunnel is almost at the top.

PARBELO:       Your valley must be like a crater in the top of this mountain, Chloe.

CHLOE:           Bah!  Yes.  Valley big secret.  We never stick nose out since we find it.  No-

                          body ever find us but you.

RIX:                  It doesnít seem like a very exciting home for beasts as curious as Stare-e-

                          oxicans.

CHLOE:           Very dull valley.  Big bore.  Bah.

DOROTHY:     Why do the Stare-e-oxicans stay there, then?

CHLOE:           We too easy.  Our ancestors lived out here.  Always listen to talk-talk.  Always

                          lend muscle to people who need help.  Always workóworkówork for

                          somebody.  By-n-by, all Stare-e-oxicans just big slaves.  What for?  Search me.

DOROTHY:     I see.  So when you found the secret valley, you all decided youíd rather live there and be bored than stay out here and be enslaved.

CHLOE:           That right.

PARBELO:      Rest assured, gentle beast, I will protect you from your over-sympathetic nature,

                          and you will live in ease and comfort with my carnival.  There will be hundreds

                          of people for you to stare at every day.

JIMSY:             And to stare at you, of course.

PARBELO:       You have my promise before these witnesses: if you ever want to return to

                          your valley, I will provide you with safe escort.

CHLOE:           Bah!  Why me wanta go back to that stupid place?  Me think-un country down

                          there is much prettier.

DOROTHY:     It is a lovely view from up here, isnít it?  Isnít that the Road of Yellow Bricks

                          down yonder, Sawhorse?

SAWHORSE:   I think so.  But itís a long ways off.  Weíll be on this rocky mountain for another

                          hour at least.

DOROTHY:     Well anyway, we canít get lost again now.  The Road of Yellow Bricks leads

                          directly to the Emerald City.

CHLOE:           Me see-um short-cut.  Lookum like smooth path cut between cliffs.

DOROTHY:     Oh good!  Itís wide enough for the wagon, too.  Lead on, Chloe. Weíll be off

                          the mountain in no time, after all.

 

MUSIC:            UP AND OUT

 

JIMSY:             This Pass doesnít seem so wide to me.

RIX:                  No, it doesnít any more, does it?  Is it possible that the sides are closing in on us?

DOROTHY:     Closing in?  Oh!  They are, they are!  Run, Sawhorse!  Run!  Letís get out of

                          here!

SAWHORSE:   Canít you run any faster than that, Chloe?  Youíre blocking the traffic.

CHLOE:           Me run like wind!  Bah!

PARBELO:       We made it, Chloe, we made it!  Weíre out of that granite trap.

SOUND:           WAGON SCRAPING AGAINST WALLS OF ROCK

JIMSY:             Rix!  These rock walls are pinching me.

RIX:                  Weíre stuck!  Weíre stuck tight!  The sides of this Pass have closed up on us and

                          are holding the wagon like a bug in a pair of tweezers.

PARBELO:      (OFFSTAGE) Yoo hoo!  Are you all right in there?

DOROTHY:     I guess so.  If itís all right to be clamped in the bottom of a narrow little chasm

                          this way.

RIX:                  I wonder how Chloe and Parbelo escaped.  They were still in the Pass when it

                          caught us.

DOROTHY:     I guess itís because Chloe isnít as wide as the wagon.  She had room to keep moving after the wagon held the walls from closing in any further.

PARBELO:       (OFFSTAGE) The walls arenít moving anymore; why donít you climb out of

                          the wagon and walk out?

DOROTHY:     Of course!  Why didnít we think of that?

RIX:                  Climb out over the Sawhorse, Dorothy.  Iíll follow and unhitch him.

DOROTHY:     Iíll have to apologize to Ozma for losing her wagon, but she can probably get it

                          back with the Magic Belt.

RIX:                  There you are, Sawhorse, youíre unhitched.  Trot on out.  Come on Jimsy.

JIMSY:             (Sniff) Good  bye, Rix.  I hope you think of me once in a (sniff) while.

RIX:                  What?  Oh, I forgot.  You canít pull yourself out of the wagon, can you?  Here,

                          Iíll climb back and give you a hand.

JIMSY:             Itís no use, Rix.  Look at me.  This Pass is as narrow as the wagon and about

                          twelve feet to the top.  Nobody can hoist me out of this ditch.

DOROTHY:     (OFFSTAGE) Come on, Rix!  Whatís keeping you?

RIX:                  Itís Jimsy.  Heís really stuck!

JIMSY:             Go with your friends, Rix.  What good would it do for you to stay here?  You

                          should have left me long ago.  Iíve been nothing but trouble to you (sniff)!  If it

                          hadnít been for me, youíd be in the Emerald City right now with Dorothy and the

                          Sawhorse.  I (sniff), I donít want to be, but Iím just a burden (sniff) to you.

RIX:                  Donít start that again, Jimsy.  Maybe I canít help you, but Iím certainly not

                          going to go away and leave you in a spot like this.

DOROTHY:     (OFFSTAGE) Shall I go for help, Rix?  Iíll ride the Sawhorse and get to

                          Glindaís Palace as fast as I can.

RIX:                  Whoís Glinda?

DOROTHY:     Sheís the most powerful Sorceress in the Land of Oz, and a very good friend of

                          mine.  If anybody can help Jimsy, Glinda can.

RIX:                  Yes, do that, Dorothy.  Iíll stay here with Jimsy.

JIMSY:             Go with her, Rix.  The Sawhorse can carry two of you.  This Magic Pass is

                          probably a trap set by some evil Mountain Spirit, and youíd be in danger if you

                          stayed here.

RIX:                  Hush, Jimsy!  Iím not going to leave you here alone, so quit talking about it.

JIMSY:             Oooooh Ri-i-ix!  Youíre so good to me!

 

MUSIC:            UP AND OUT

 

JIMSY:             Do you think Dorothy and the Sawhorse have reached Glindaís palace yet?

RIX:                  They must have.  Itís almost morning, and the Sawhorse is the fastest creature

                          on four legs.

JIMSY:             It was kind of Chloe and Parbelo to offer to stay here with us.

RIX:                  Yes.  Iím sure they meant it too.  But like you said, what would be the use?

                          I only hope they found the carnival before it disbanded or something.

JIMSY:             Iím thirsty, Rix.

RIX:                  Well, if you donít mind drinking out of the bottle I found you in, Iíll go

                          on out and see if I can find a mountain stream.

 

MUSIC:            BRIEF

 

RIX:                  (In a whisper) Jimsy! Jimsy!

JIMSY:             That was a quick trip!  Was there a mountain stream right next to this place?

RIX:                  I didnít go all the way out.  There are some little people out there sitting cross-

                          legged on a big rock and smoking pipes.  I could see them very clearly in the

                          bright moonlight.

JIMSY:             What kind of little people?

RIX:                  I donít know how to describe them, exactly.  They look like... leprechauns.  Most

                          of them have beards, and one of them is wearing a green jacket and a red cap

                          with a white feather in it.

JIMSY:             White Owlís Feather!

RIX:                  I donít know what kind of a feather it is.

JIMSY:             It must be!  In this area, it couldnít be anyone else.

RIX:                  Who?

JIMSY:             White Owlís Feather, of course.  Heís sort of a relation of mine, second double

                          cousin once removed, or maybe twice removed.  I havenít seen him for about a

                          century.

RIX:                  That little, bitty man is your cousin?  Do you want me to fetch him here to you?

JIMSY:             Heís a wise little man; might know the answer to this trap Iím in.  But you canít

                          just walk up to one of the Wee Folk.  Youíve got to know the right limerick to

                          chant.  Then grab him by the beard while heís still spellbound and count to ten.

RIX:                  Oh my!  Do you know what it is?  The limerick, I mean?

JIMSY:             I know the right one for him, if thatís who it is.  Now listen carefully and Iíll

                          teach it to you.

 

MUSIC:

ďWee folk, good folk, trooping all together,

Green Jacket, red cap, White Owlís Feather,

Up the airy mountain,

Past the fairy fountain...Ē

 

UP AND OUT

 

FEATHER:       So thatís where youíve been keep iní yourself.  Voyaginí in a bottle, eh?  

JIMSY:             It was no pleasure cruise.  I got pretty tired sitting after a few years.

FEATHER:       You might be having a few more years of sitting to do, Iím thinkiní.  Then again,

                          the Old Man of the Mountain might chance this way within the hour.

JIMSY:             The Old Man of the Mountain?  Is he the one who set this infernal trap?

FEATHER:       The same.  Heís as tall as this canyon, and twice as mean.  Heíll be after grindiní

                          your bones to make his bread if youíre still sittiní here when he makes his

                          rounds.

JIMSY:             What can I do about it, Cousin?  Do you know how I can get out of here?

FEATHER:       Well now, I wouldnít be knowiní how youíd manage it, but if somethiní wider

                          than yourself should happen this way, the canyon walls would spread apart to

                          admit it, and yourself would come unstuck.

SMIDGINS:     (COMING ONSTAGE) White Feather!  White Feather!  Come out of here with

                          ye and be quick!

FEATHER:       What ails you, Smidgins?

SMIDGINS:     ĎTis a strange caravan approaching by the dawnís early light.  Wagons and

                          wagons with beasts all about, and leading the lot is a Stare-e-oxican if youíd

                          believe it!

RIX:                  Why, thatís Parbelo and Chloe and the carnival.  They came back, Jimsy, and I

                          know now how they can get you out of here, too!

JIMSY:             You do?  How?

RIX:                  Your cousin just told us.  Weíll lash one of the circus tent-poles cross-wise to the

                          front of one of the wagons.  Then weíll drive it into this Pass.  When the walls

                          move back to admit it, youíll be free!

FEATHER:       Youíre a brilliant lad!  That should work, Iím thinkiní.

DOROTHY:     (OFFSTAGE) Rix!  Jimsy!  Are you still in there?

RIX:                  Dorothy, is that you?

DOROTHY:     Yes, we met the carnival down at the foot of the mountain so we all came back

                          together.  I was hoping Glinda had freed you by now.

RIX:                  Did you see her?

DOROTHY:     Yes, and she went right to work searching for a way to break this spell.  She said

                          it wouldnít be easy, but...

SOUND:          AS OF DISTANT THUNDER.  GIANT FOOTSTEPS DRAWING NEARER

SMIDGINS:     Hist!  ĎTis the Old Man cominí round the mountain!

FEATHER:       Goodby, Cousin!  Nice seeing you!

RIX:                  The Old Man of the Mountain?

FEATHER:       Himself!  Bye now! 

JIMSY:             Too late to get me out of here, now Rix.  Run, before itís too late!

RIX:                  Maybe Glindaís magic will work before the Old Man gets here.

JIMSY:             Maybe, but donít wait to find out.  Hurry, get out there to your friends and...

RIX:                  Why do you keep saying ďmyĒ friends?  Theyíre your friends, too, you know, or

                          they wouldnít have risked coming back here.

JIMSY:             My friends?  Mine?

RIX:                  Of course they are.  Why would any of us be here if we werenít?

JIMSY:             You, too?

RIX:                  Especially me.  Youíre my very first friend, and my very best, and Iíll never

                          leave you when youíre in trouble!

SOUND:           SWOOSH!  SWOOSH!  SWOOSH!

CHLOE:           Bah!  Me mixed up.  Me dizzy.

PARBELO:       So am I, Chloe, and Iíve been through this before.  Where are we this time?

DOROTHY:     Well, what do you know?  Thatís the Emerald City straight ahead.  I guess

                          Glindaís magic worked just in the nick of time.

JIMSY:             It wasnít Glindaís magic, it was yours.

DOROTHY:     Mine?

JIMSY:             All of you.  The Magic of Friendship.

RIX:                  What do you mean, Jimsy?  Did you bring us here?

JIMSY:             Well, itís this way, Rix.  You used your last wish for true, loyal friends.  Now

                          Iíve lived a few thousand years longer than you have and Iíve never had a real

                          friend.  Never before did anyone do anything (stars puddling up) for me without

                          expecting a favor in return. (Sniff) And nowÖ you (sniff), you stood by me at

                          the risk of your own (sniff) life... and the others... came back (sniff) when they

                          knew (sniff)!

DOROTHY:     Jimsy!  Donít you dare cry now!

JIMSY:             Youíve all made me sooo haa-aa-ppy!  I just... I just...

RIX:                  You just what?  It was you who transported us here, wasnít it?

JIMSY:             (Meekly) Sometimes I donít know my own strength.

DOROTHY:     Oh Jimsy!  Youíre wonderful.  We all do love you.

PARBELO:       Every-body!  Par-ade form-ation!  Weíll parade into the Emerald City and put on

                          the show of our lives for Princess Ozma!

DOROTHY:     Good!  Come on, Rix, you can ride on the Sawhorse with me!

PARBELO:       Rea-dy!  March!  Hip!  Hip!  Hip!

SOUND:           CIRCUS MUSIC

JIMSY:             Rix!   Wait for me!

DOROTHY:     Isnít this fun?  Step lively, Chloe, or else get out of our way!

JIMSY:             Wait!  Wait for me!  Iím still stuck in this wagon, you know.  Hey!  Wait

                          Rix!  Ri-i-i-ix!!

 

***THE END ***

 

For synopsis and continuity notes, go here

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